Yala Kol Express

Whenever I see a restaurant in a strip plaza, I'm not eager to partake. I mean how good can it be? It's in a strip mall for cryin' out loud. I know, "You can't judge a book by its storefront, etc." But I've found few exceptions to the strip mall rule. 


For good Mediterranean food, I already have a few places I enjoy. That's all I need. I'm not a difficult person to please.

The wife, however, is always down to try a new place, and Mediterranean is her favorite. When she spotted Yala Kol Express Mediterranean Grill in Lambertville, we stopped in for dinner. 


At Yala Kol Express, you go up to a counter and order, kinda like you're at Burger King. Then you wait for your food with a number, kinda like you're at Burger King. You get your own drinks. You get your own bread. You fetch the utensils. The most the staff does is point-out the cutlery perched atop the counter. The girl behind the counter is not a waitress, simply a cashier. 


I know, I know: “Jo, that’s what ‘express’ means!”  But, this place has the feel of a cafeteria--like the kind Kmart used to have. (But not as much fun because you're not 5 anymore. And you're picking-up the tab, not your parents.)


Then, the meal is being served-up in courses, so when your number is called you go back up to the counter to retrieve the salads, then the mains, then the sides--however many trips it takes. Good thing this place is small. 


At first glance, the menu seems overpriced. Some of the servings--like the gyro sandwich--are large, but everybody around Toledo has these same, big overstuffed gyros on thin pita. So differentiate yourself. Give me something I haven't seen before. Give me something great. At least serve me a good tzatziki. By the way, the tzatziki tasted like mayonnaise, plus a few other ingredients that give it that red/white/green Christmas-look that I hadn't seen until I moved to the Toledo area. 


The salads were freshly made. Nothing fancy about the dressing; mostly lemon and oil. I didn't taste any vinegar. There were no pita chips or homemade croutons, mostly greens and tomatoes. 


We also ordered the shish kafta plate, which my wife enjoyed. It had the familiar smoky, grilled-lamb flavor that we like, with parsley and seasoning. It came with a lentil soup which was tasty and light, but could have been richer. It tasted fresh. Pita bread is always a good complement, and it seemed like we were welcome to run back to the counter and grab as much pita as we could handle. 


We ordered a side of hummus, which also tasted like mayonnaise, plus a few other ingredients. They had battered fries that were good, but make for a heavy side dish combined with all the other food. 


This is the only place I've ever seen where it costs a dollar for garlic paste. 


The mixed grill isn't an assortment of kabobs. It's just a gyro, deconstructed, plus chicken--dry chicken. 


Let's just say the girl at the front wasn't a "people person." Yala kol had a special going on: BOGO sandwiches. We didn't find out about this until someone texted my wife and told her about it after we had already paid for our order. We had purchased one sandwich for our daughter. The cashier didn't bring up the special, nor offer us the free sandwich. My wife inquired about it at the counter, and the cashier argued that we should normally be SOL because we didn't mention the special, but that she would wrap another sandwich for us to take. She threw a couple of baklava in the bag for our trouble. 


In a nutshell: the experience was not too good. You're the waiter, the busser, the boxer-upper. Not much for friendly staff. The place might as well have been called Autonomous Cafe. Don't they always say that part of the price you pay at a restaurant includes ambience? Atmosphere? Then Yala doesn't do well in that category either. At this price range, instead of Yala, I'll stick with Ya Halla, which, in comparison, seems like fine dining. 

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